October 19, 2006
Dorm Life Is A Biatch (one year + 21)
You know those moments when you say something to be polite yet the other person seems to either take it the wrong way or decides to be a complete asshole in a somewhat witty fashion and then you spend the next 1/2 hour wondering if what you thought was a polite action was actually rude and thus had the opposite effect of what you originally intended??
I had one of those moments tonight.
When staying in dorm rooms there are agreed polite and impolite ways of being. For example, getting up early and zipping and unzipping your pack a bazzillion times while playing with plastic bags is impolite. Taking a quick shower because you know a girl trying to catch a train is waiting outside in her towel is polite. Choosing to read with all the lights on when everyone else has gone to bed is impolite, while letting someone keep the light on to read when you're going to bed is polite.
In some situations it's a fine line between being considerate (saying goodbye to your "pass"1 at the door) and inconsiderate (making out with him on your top bunk until 6am). Yet inspite of how confusing some rules may be, there is one which is quite clear and well understood. The Late Night Entry Rule. It is understood by all that if someone is asleep in the room and it is late a night, one should tip toe and cease all conversation upon entering. In addition to this, and most importantly, it is completely and totally taboo to turn on the light without prior permission from those sleeping, given that most human beings are instantaneously awoken when bright light hits their eyelids. As a result, the polite will stumble about the room in pitch blackness fumbling with zippers, clothing and toothbrushes probably waking the sleeping occupants in the process but never commiting the forbidden act of turning on the light.
Given this, many considerate dormmates will tell others when they are going to bed and (if he or she doesn't mind) let them know that they can turn on the light to assist in their night time preparations.
This is exactly what I did this evening. On my way out the door I said I was heading to bed, but if the guys wanted to turn on the light when they came in later that night it wouldn't bother me.
His reply: "Oh, we will". He then chuckled and walked away.
I stood there puzzled for a split second and then as I walked to the room the thoughts began to flow. Who was the asshole? Was my comment seen as bossy and controlling? Was he meaning to be humerous? Am I a bitch? Is he drunk? Am I thinking too much????
After pondering the situation through brushing my teeth, washing my face and changing my clothes I realized that I would never know. But as I climbed into bed I knew one thing, I would make sure to groan and turn over in an exaggerated fashion when they came in later and turned on the light.
1) "Pass" (pronounced pash) as in passion. Refers to an "innocent" one night stand, random makeout session or snog. And yes, the English have gotten to me.
I had one of those moments tonight.
When staying in dorm rooms there are agreed polite and impolite ways of being. For example, getting up early and zipping and unzipping your pack a bazzillion times while playing with plastic bags is impolite. Taking a quick shower because you know a girl trying to catch a train is waiting outside in her towel is polite. Choosing to read with all the lights on when everyone else has gone to bed is impolite, while letting someone keep the light on to read when you're going to bed is polite.
In some situations it's a fine line between being considerate (saying goodbye to your "pass"1 at the door) and inconsiderate (making out with him on your top bunk until 6am). Yet inspite of how confusing some rules may be, there is one which is quite clear and well understood. The Late Night Entry Rule. It is understood by all that if someone is asleep in the room and it is late a night, one should tip toe and cease all conversation upon entering. In addition to this, and most importantly, it is completely and totally taboo to turn on the light without prior permission from those sleeping, given that most human beings are instantaneously awoken when bright light hits their eyelids. As a result, the polite will stumble about the room in pitch blackness fumbling with zippers, clothing and toothbrushes probably waking the sleeping occupants in the process but never commiting the forbidden act of turning on the light.
Given this, many considerate dormmates will tell others when they are going to bed and (if he or she doesn't mind) let them know that they can turn on the light to assist in their night time preparations.
This is exactly what I did this evening. On my way out the door I said I was heading to bed, but if the guys wanted to turn on the light when they came in later that night it wouldn't bother me.
His reply: "Oh, we will". He then chuckled and walked away.
I stood there puzzled for a split second and then as I walked to the room the thoughts began to flow. Who was the asshole? Was my comment seen as bossy and controlling? Was he meaning to be humerous? Am I a bitch? Is he drunk? Am I thinking too much????
After pondering the situation through brushing my teeth, washing my face and changing my clothes I realized that I would never know. But as I climbed into bed I knew one thing, I would make sure to groan and turn over in an exaggerated fashion when they came in later and turned on the light.
1) "Pass" (pronounced pash) as in passion. Refers to an "innocent" one night stand, random makeout session or snog. And yes, the English have gotten to me.
